“Woah! We’re half way there! Oh-oh – living on a prayer!”
Yes, Bon Jovi, we’ve made it to the half-way point of my internship, midterms.
It’s so hard to believe it’s really half over! Some days, I feel like my experience here could go on forever, that it’s just my life now. Other days I am definitely counting the weeks until my schedule is my own again. I have learned so much since I started here, I am certainly not the same clinician, or even the same person who walked through the door in June. I’ve grown and learned to be playful with music and to celebrate little wins -both my own and others. I’ve learned that there is no one right way to be a music therapist, and even experienced professionals have tough days. I’ve learned that flexibility is an asset, but so is excellent planning. Sleep is as necessary as food, and it’s okay to be myself.
With all that said, there is so much more for me to learn. I’m not sure I can pick up all the essentials remaining in the time I have left here. I still need to learn more techniques for improvising, and strategies for quality and efficient session planning. I need to learn how to navigate the professional world and stand on my own two feet. I want to learn more music, and more about how to reach people, and about what to say in difficult situations. I want to learn the business side of things, how to price services and make connections in the community.
It’s easy to look at my internship glass and think, ‘it’s half empty, I’ve spent this much time and still make mistakes and have so much left to learn’. But it is just as fair to see the glass as half full and think, ‘wow, look how much I have gained in this short time, I’m sure my glass will fill up soon’. Right now I think I’m ready to just appreciate the glass as a snapshot in time. I’m exactly where I need to be in my development, and I am confident I will continue to grow in the time that is laid out for me.
Sometimes it’s hard to be content in the moment. I frequently want to rush ahead to what I know is in store, or dwell on the past and the mistakes I’ve made. But when I do either of those things I fail to live in the moment and appreciate the progress I’m making and the people I get to share it with. Everyone around me is reminding me,
“Take my hand, we’ll make it I swear. Oh-oh, Livin’ on a prayer!”
Some days I certainly feel like I am living on a prayer, but then I remember that I’m not alone and everyone here at Harmony Garden believes in me and wants me to succeed. I am so blessed. Happy half-way point to me!